Headlights On Dark Roads
by SlytherinFTW
Summary: Post-In My Time Of Dying. Dean decides he should let Sam know about his feelings.


_For once I want to be the car crash  
Not always just the traffic jam  
Hit me hard enough to wake me  
And lead me wild to your dark roads  
Headlights show it all before me  
So beautiful so clear  
I will reach out and take it  
Cause I'm so tired of all this fear  
My tongue is lost so I can't tell you  
Please just see it in my eyes  
I'll pull the thorns from our ripped bodies  
And let the blood fall in my mouth_

Dean took another swig of his drink, emptying it and setting it down on the small sticky table which was already holding four empty bottles.

He had been there for some time, walking to the nearby bar from the motel. The room was almost deserted, with a few drunken stragglers lingering. The barmaids were wiping the tables down and it was almost closing time.

His most recent near-death experience was what made him realize that he wasn't going to be around forever. It was a much-needed wake-up call. It was this time that really struck home for him because he had had his foot in death's door; unlike other times when it was simply a matter of time or a case of pure luck that he hadn't been injured worse.

And he wasn't naïve; he knew that with the life he led, it definitely wouldn't be the last time he had a near-death experience.

It all became clear now; he needed to sort things out before it was too late. And one issue stuck out in his alcohol-dazed mind: Sam.

He had consumed enough alcohol for him to be willing to tell Sam everything. About how long he'd loved him, wanted him, dreamed about him. He had been so _fucking shit-scared_ that Sam would leave him, hate him, be disappointed in him that he had done nothing but keep it bottled up inside, letting it fester as he did with anything else that he refuse to let see the light of day.

He got up and staggered a bit as he did, and he left the bar. The motel was the next street down, and by the time he had reached the room he had gotten his wits about him just enough to be able to have a decent conversation without slurring too many words together.

He opened the door and went in, greeted with Sam practically in his face.

"I was just going to get you. How much have you had to drink? You _stink_. Go have a shower or something."

All Dean did was take advantage of Sam's proximity to him. He leant forward and kissed Sam. A simple, chaste kiss, that lingered as Dean inhaled, smelling Sam's unique scent. Sam came out of his state of shock and pushed his brother away, Dean's back hitting the door.

"What the fuck, Dean? Sure, you're drunk, but…what the _fuck_?!?" Sam normally refrained from swearing, but now was a time where it was appropriate. Dean took a step toward Sam and Sam took one back.

"I love you, Sam, that's what. I've loved you for years. I've just been too afraid to say it. I want to make love to you." Dean said, grabbing Sam's dick through his jeans.

"Yeah…I can see that…" Sam said, gingerly peeling away Dean's hand. Sam took another step back, though not as big as the last time. There was an awkward silence.

"I don't get it."

"What?" Sam was really confused now.

"You're not disgusted, you're not going to leave, you're not _hating_ me. But you're not jumping my bones, either."

"You're drunk, Dean." Sam said simply, as though that answer solved everything.

"So? You obviously aren't freaking out about it. Come morning, I'm not going to feel any different about you. So tell me already; do you think I'm a fine piece of ass that you want some of or not?"

Sam shook his head in disbelief. Dean's ego could probably be seen from space, but when he was drunk it kinda got launched all the way _into_ space.

"Dean, I think you should just go to sleep. We'll work this out in the morning when your brain isn't so clouded."

"I'm not going to be able to go to sleep if you don't answer my question."

"Jesus, Dean. How about a compromise? You get into bed and get ready to go to sleep then I'll answer your question." Sam knew from personal experience that normally when Dean was this drunk, the moment his head hit the pillow he'd be out like a light.

Unfortunately for Sam, this wasn't one of those nights.

Dean had settled into bed and was looking at Sam expectantly. Sam got into his bed and lay down.

"Well?"

Another awkward silence.

"Yes."

Then Sam turned off the light.

***

Sam pretended to be asleep until Dean's breathing indicated that he had fallen asleep. Sam rolled over onto his back and sighed.

He was so afraid. Sure, Dean had admitted his feelings for Sam, but Dean had been drunk. And it was entirely possible that Dean was just playing some cruel, drunken joke on him. And come morning, Dean would decide to leave him because he knew just how much of a freak Sam was. Sam continued to hope that Dean was being genuine, or, if not, he didn't remember what Sam said. Sam slowly drifted off to sleep.

***

Dean woke up the next morning and tried to recall what had happened last night. Memories of the previous night were jumbled together in a haze, but slowly they became clearer. Dean's stomach lurched as he remembered what had happened when he came back to the motel.

He looked over at Sam's sleeping form in the other bed, and then remembered what Sam had said the moment before turning off the light. His heart leapt at the thought that maybe everything would be okay between them; better than okay.

With that thought in his head he got up and had a shower. By the time he got out Sam was up and about.

"So, Sam--"

"Dean...last night...were you being serious? Or were you just being stupid or something? I mean, you _were_ drunk after all..." Sam rambled anxiously.

Dean's expression said it all. Sam took one look at Dean and shut up.

"Sam…" Dean couldn't get the words out. It wasn't really his fault; he just avoided conversation like this as much as possible. But Sam could tell; he'd known Dean all his life. Sam decided that if Dean couldn't say it, he would.

"Dean…I meant what I said last night."

"Me…me too." Dean looked at the wall behind Sam. Sure, Sam had said that he _did_ mean what he said, but Dean was still kinda uncomfortable with the current situation.

Sam knew that at this rate, they weren't really gonna get anywhere. So he decided he'd take matters into his own hands.

Sam walked over to Dean, quickly closing the gap between them. This time it was Sam who kissed Dean, and this time it was reciprocated.

Sam pushed Dean up against the wall, the kiss deepening. It became more and more of a this-is-just-a-taste-of-what-I'm-going-to-do-to-you kind of kiss, with Sam alternating between sucking on Dean's tongue and basically tongue-fucking Dean's mouth. Dean wound his hand in Sam's hair, the other hand resting on Sam's hip.

They pulled back, gasping for air. Dean didn't realize he had closed his eyes till he opened them. His lips were wet and swollen, his face flushed. Sam gazed at Dean, eyes hooded and dark. Dean subconsciously licked his lips, and Sam's eyes followed his tongue.

Dean attacked Sam's lips, pushing him toward the closest bed as he did so. His hands ran under Sam's shirt, tugging it up over his head. The back of Sam's legs hit the bed, and Dean pushed him onto it, following him down.

Dean fumbled with Sam's belt buckle and latched on to Sam's neck, sucking and biting. He got Sam's belt undone and started working on his fly. Sam tried to get Dean's shirt off, and Dean paused to take it off. He pulled Sam's jeans off, and continued his attack on Sam's neck, moving down to his collarbone.

Sam moaned loudly as Dean's mouth reached his nipples. He wrapped his arms around Dean's back and rocked his hips as Dean continued to suck and bite his nipples. Dean moved down Sam's stomach, dipping his tongue into Sam's navel along the way, and reached his destination of the waistband of Sam's boxers.

Dean took off Sam's boxers in a single swift movement and engulfed Sam's cock, making him arch off the bed. Dean gripped Sam's hips to keep Sam still as he ran his tongue along the underside, making Sam moan again. Dean moved up and down Sam's cock, feeling it hit the back of his throat several times. Sam's moans became louder and he came with a loud cry of Dean's name.

Dean took it all, and made his way back up and kissed Sam again, making Sam taste his come in Dean's mouth. Sam took Dean's jeans off, quickly followed by his boxers.

They both gasped at the sensation of skin against skin, Sam quickly growing hard again. They rocked against each other, reveling in the feeling of their erections rubbing against each other.

Dean wanted, _needed_ more. He reached down and grabbed his jacket, fishing around in the deep pockets for some lube. Upon finding it, he put it on the bed and tossed away the jacket.

Dean lubed up a few fingers and pressed one into Sam. He was met with some resistance at first, but it quickly subsided. He added another, scissoring them to stretch him. Sam was writhing, and when Dean's fingers hit that sweet spot inside him he cursed loudly. Dean pulled his fingers out, Sam whimpering softly at the lack of sensation.

Dean put a liberal amount of lube on his dick, and pressed against Sam's opening. He slowly pushed his way in, until he was balls-deep inside his brother. He didn't move, but it was killing him.

"You can move." Sam said, and Dean pulled out until just the head of his dick was inside Sam, and he thrust back in, Sam moaning and arching up. They continued, the pace quickening, Dean's mouth uttering profanities.

Dean hit Sam's prostate again, and again, and shortly after Sam was coming. The sensation of Sam's muscles clenching around Dean's cock made Dean come shortly after, still thrusting until he was spent. He pulled out and collapsed, half draped over Sam.

Their breathing slowly returned to normal, and Sam was on the verge of sleep when Dean spoke up.

"Is this gonna be a regular thing?"

Sam turned and looked at Dean, a smile playing over his lips.

"I sure hope so."

Dean smiled too.

"Good." Dean kissed Sam tenderly and they slowly drifted off to sleep.


End file.
